A young couple lived in a crime-ridden town. After three of their neighbors' houses were robbed, they decided to get a guard dog.
The wife went to a pet store and said, "I need a good guard dog." The clerk replied, "Sorry, we're sold out. All we have left is this little Scottie dog. But he knows karate."
Skeptical, the wife asked for a demonstration. The clerk told the dog, "Karate that chair." The dog approached the chair and shattered it. "Karate that table," the clerk then said. The dog went to the table and split it in half.
Convinced, the wife bought the dog and took it home. Her husband, who had expected a large guard dog, was disappointed and skeptical.
When she told him the dog knew karate, he scoffed, "Karate my ass!"
To this day, he remains in the hospital.