If you kiss her, you are not a gentleman;
If you don't, you are not a man.
If you praise her, she thinks you are lying;
If you don't, you are good for nothing.
If you agree to all her likes, she is abusing;
If you don't, you are not understanding.
If you make romance, you are an 'experienced man';
If you don't, you are half a man.
If you visit her too often, she thinks it is boring;
If you don't, she accuses you of double crossing.
If you are well dressed, she says you are a playboy;
If you don't, you are a dull boy.
If you are jealous, she says it's bad;
If you don't, she thinks you do not love her.
If you attempt a romance, she says you didn't respect her;
If you don't, she thinks you do not like her.
If you are a minute late, she complains it's hard to wait;
If she is late, she says that's a girl's way.