Jack was about to marry Jill, so his father sat him down for a chat.
He said, "Jack, let me tell you something. On my wedding night in our honeymoon suite, I took off my pants, handed them to your mother, and said, 'Here, try these on.'
"She did and said, 'These are too big; I can't wear them.'
"I replied, 'Exactly. I wear the pants in this family, and I always will.'
"Ever since that night, we've never had any problems."
"Hmm," said Jack. He thought he might try the same. On his honeymoon, Jack took off his pants and said to Jill, "Here, try these on."
She did and said, "These are too large; they don't fit me."
Jack said, "Exactly. I wear the pants in this family, and I always will. I don't want you to ever forget that."
Then Jill took off her pants, handed them to Jack, and said, "Here, you try on mine."
He tried and said, "I can't get into your pants."
Jill said, "Exactly. And if you don't change your smart-ass attitude, you never will."