He said: I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it.
She said: You wear pants, don't you?
He said: Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
She said: That's a good idea — you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa.
He said: What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?
She said: Turn sideways and look in the mirror!
On a wall in a ladies' room: "My husband follows me everywhere."
Written just below it: "I do not."
Q: How many honest, intelligent, caring men in the world does it take to do the dishes?
A: Both of them.
Q: How does a man show that he is planning for the future?
A: He buys two cases of beer.
Q: What is the difference between men and government bonds?
A: The bonds mature.
Q: Why are blonde jokes so short?
A: So men can remember them.
Q: How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
A: We don't know; it has never happened.
Q: What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
A: A widow.
Q: Why are married women heavier than single women?
A: Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed. Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.
Q: What is the one thing that all men at singles bars have in common?
A: They're married.
Man says to God: "God, why did you make woman so beautiful?"
God says: "So you would love her."
Man says: "But God, why did you make her so dumb?"
God says: "So she would love you."