Lazy Harry | 懒汉海利

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Lazy Harry

Harry was so lazy that although his only daily task was to drive his goat out to graze, he would still sigh heavily upon returning home each evening. "What a weary job," he complained. "What a terrible burden, year after year! If only I could nap while she feeds! But no, I must keep watch or she'll damage trees, squeeze through hedges, or run away. What a life! No peace, no relaxation."

He sat down, deep in thought, seeking a way to rid himself of this burden. After much pondering, a solution dawned on him. "I know! I'll marry Fat Katie. She has a goat too, so she can take mine out with hers, and I won't have to wear myself out like this."

So Harry got up and walked across the street to where Fat Katie's parents lived. He asked for the hand of their hard-working, virtuous daughter. Her parents agreed without hesitation, saying, "Like to like makes a good match." Thus, Fat Katie became Harry's wife and took both goats out to graze. Harry spent his days very pleasantly, with nothing more strenuous to recover from than his own idleness. He only went out with her occasionally, saying, "I do this so I'll enjoy my rest afterwards all the more; otherwise, you lose appreciation for it."

But Fat Katie was no less idle than Harry. "Harry dear," she said one day, "why needlessly make our lives a misery and spoil our youth? Those goats wake us with their bleating every morning. Wouldn't it be better to exchange them with our neighbor for a beehive? We can place it in a sunny spot behind the house and leave it to look after itself. Bees don't need minding or grazing; they fly out, find their way home, and make honey without us lifting a finger."

"You're very sensible," Harry replied. "Let's do it right away. Besides, honey is tastier and healthier than goat's milk, and it stores longer."

The neighbor willingly gave them a beehive for the two goats. The bees worked tirelessly from dawn till dusk, filling the hive with fine honey. By autumn, Harry had collected a whole jar.

They placed the jar on a shelf fixed to the wall above their bed. Fearing theft or mice, Katie fetched a sturdy hazel rod and put it by the bed, so she could reach it without getting up to drive away any unwelcome visitors.

Lazy Harry never rose before midday. "Too soon out of bed and you'll soon be dead," he'd say. One morning, still lolling in bed in broad daylight, he said to his wife, "Women have a sweet tooth, and you've been at that honey again. Before you eat it all, let's exchange it for a goose and a gander."

"Not until we have a child to mind them!" replied Fat Katie. "You don't suppose I'd want to be bothered with goslings, needlessly wearing out my strength?"

"And do you suppose a boy would look after geese?" said Harry. "Nowadays children don't obey; they do as they please, thinking they're cleverer than their parents."

"Well then," answered Katie, "he'd better look out if he disobeys me. I'll take a stick and tan his hide. Watch me, Harry!" she exclaimed, seizing the stick meant for the mice. "Watch me beat his backside off!" She lifted the stick but unfortunately struck the honey jar above the bed. The jar smashed against the wall, and the fine honey trickled onto the floor.

"Well, so much for the goose and gander," said Harry. "We shan't have to mind them now. Luckily, the jar didn't fall on my head; we have every cause to be content." Seeing some honey left in a fragment, he picked it up cheerfully. "Wife, let's enjoy what's left and rest a bit after the fright. What does it matter if we get up later? The day's still long enough."

"Oh yes," answered Katie. "Better late than never."

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