A seaman meets a pirate in a bar, and they take turns telling their adventures on the seas. The seaman notes that the pirate has a peg leg, a hook for a hand, and an eye patch. Curious, the seaman asks, "So, how did you end up with the peg leg?"
The pirate replies, "I was swept overboard into a school of sharks. Just as my men were pulling me out, a shark bit my leg off."
"Wow!" said the seaman. "What about the hook?"
"Well..." begins the pirate, "...we were boarding an enemy ship and battling the other sailors with swords. One of the enemy cut my hand clean off."
"Incredible!" remarked the seaman. "How did you get the eye patch?"
"A seagull dropping fell into my eye," replied the pirate.
"You lost your eye to a seagull dropping?" the sailor asked, incredulous.
"Well..." said the pirate, "...that was my first day with the hook."