English Original
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.
Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.
When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.
Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
Chuck Norris' hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.
There is no such thing as global warming. Chuck Norris was cold, so he turned the sun up.
Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.
Chuck Norris doesn't wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.
Chuck Norris gave Mona Lisa that smile.
Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost.
Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a DeltaForce marathon on Satellite TV.
Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.
中文翻译
每当夜魔上床睡觉时，他都要检查衣柜里有没有查克·诺里斯。
查克·诺里斯不读书。他会用眼神震慑书本，直到得到他想要的信息。
没有进化论。只有一份查克·诺里斯允许存活的生物名单。
外太空之所以存在，是因为它害怕和查克·诺里斯待在同一个星球上。
查克·诺里斯不睡觉。他只是等待。
查克·诺里斯目前正在起诉NBC，声称“法律”与“秩序”是他左腿和右腿的商标名。
查克·诺里斯就是沃尔多躲起来的原因。
查克·诺里斯数到了无穷大——而且数了两次。
查克·诺里斯的胡子后面没有下巴。只有另一个拳头。
当查克·诺里斯做俯卧撑时，他不是在把自己撑起来，而是在把地球往下推。
查克·诺里斯速度极快，他能绕着地球跑一圈然后打中自己的后脑勺。
查克·诺里斯的手是唯一能打败皇家同花顺的牌。
全球变暖并不存在。查克·诺里斯只是觉得冷，所以把太阳调亮了些。
查克·诺里斯不仅能牵马到河边，还能让它喝水。
查克·诺里斯不戴手表，时间由他说了算。
蒙娜丽莎的微笑是查克·诺里斯赋予的。
查克·诺里斯能砰地关上旋转门。
查克·诺里斯不会得冻疮。查克·诺里斯会咬霜冻。
还记得苏联吗？他们在卫星电视上看了一场《三角洲部队》马拉松后，就决定解散了。
与普遍看法相反，美国不是一个民主国家，而是一个“查克”专政国家。