English Original
Jack was about to marry Jill, so his father sat him down for a chat.
He said, "Jack, let me tell you something. On my wedding night in our honeymoon suite, I took off my pants, handed them to your mother, and said, 'Here, try these on.'
"She did and said, 'These are too big; I can't wear them.'
"I replied, 'Exactly. I wear the pants in this family, and I always will.'
"Ever since that night, we've never had any problems."
"Hmm," said Jack. He thought he might try the same. On his honeymoon, Jack took off his pants and said to Jill, "Here, try these on."
She did and said, "These are too large; they don't fit me."
Jack said, "Exactly. I wear the pants in this family, and I always will. I don't want you to ever forget that."
Then Jill took off her pants, handed them to Jack, and said, "Here, you try on mine."
He tried and said, "I can't get into your pants."
Jill said, "Exactly. And if you don't change your smart-ass attitude, you never will."
中文翻译
杰克即将迎娶吉尔，他的父亲便坐下来与他谈心。
父亲说：“杰克，我告诉你一件事。在我们蜜月套房的婚礼当晚，我脱下裤子递给你母亲，说，‘来，试试这条。’
“她试了试说，‘这太大了，我穿不了。’
“我回答，‘没错。在这个家里我说了算，而且永远都是。’
“自那晚起，我们再没出过任何问题。”
“嗯，”杰克应道。他觉得这法子或许值得一试。于是在蜜月期间，杰克脱下裤子对吉尔说，“来，试试这条。”
吉尔试了试说，“这太大了，不合身。”
杰克说，“没错。在这个家里我说了算，而且永远都是。我希望你永远记住这一点。”
接着，吉尔脱下自己的裤子递给杰克，说，“来，你试试我的。”
杰克试了试说，“我穿不上你的裤子。”
吉尔说，“没错。如果你不改变你那自作聪明的态度，你就永远别想‘插手’（双关）。”