Creative Responses to Unwanted Visitors | 应对不速之客的创意回应

English Original

Here are some humorous and creative ways to respond when approached by proselytizers at your door:

1. When they ask, "Can I talk to you about God?" reply, "Sure, what would you like to know?"
2. Answer the door with a bloody knife and say, "I'm sorry, could you come back in a half hour? We're not done with the virgin yet."
3. Answer the door with an automatic weapon and say, 'Allah be Praised!'
4. Ask them for their address. When they ask why, claim you want to appear uninvited to peddle your own beliefs.
5. Look smug and tell them that your God can beat up their God.
6. Tell them you already have your own religion. When asked what it is, wince a little before confessing, "Er, I'm not sure if it's legal in this country."
7. Have a chalk outline of a human body on the pavement, with a few copies of "The Watchtower" scattered around.
8. Answer every one of their questions with, "What do you mean by that?" This might take a while, but you can have fun placing bets on how long it takes for them to leave.
9. Ask them to explain the story of Elisha and the forty-two children.
10. Invite them in to see your fine collection of dinosaur fossils.

中文翻译

当传教者上门拜访时，以下是一些幽默且有创意的回应方式：

1. 当他们问：“我能和你谈谈上帝吗？” 回答：“当然，你想知道什么？”
2. 拿着一把带血的刀开门，说：“抱歉，你能半小时后再来吗？我们还没处理完那个处女。”
3. 拿着一把自动武器开门，说：“赞美真主！”
4. 问他们要地址。当他们问为什么时，声称你也想不请自去，上门兜售你自己的信仰。
5. 一脸得意地告诉他们，你的上帝能打败他们的上帝。
6. 告诉他们你已经有自己的宗教信仰了。当被问及是什么时，略显痛苦地坦白道：“呃，我不确定它在这个国家是否合法。”
7. 在人行道上画一个人形粉笔轮廓，周围散落几本《守望台》杂志。
8. 用“你这么说是什么意思？”来回答他们的每一个问题。这可能需要一段时间，但你可以打赌他们多久会离开，以此取乐。
9. 请他们解释以利沙和四十二个孩子的故事。
10. 邀请他们进来参观你精美的恐龙化石收藏。