The Star-Child 4 | 星孩 4

English Original

"Nay, but thou art indeed my little son, whom I bare in the forest," she cried, and she fell on her knees, and held out her arms to him. "The robbers stole thee from me, and left thee to die," she murmured, "but I recognized thee when I saw thee, and the signs also have I recognized, the cloak of golden tissue and the amber-chain. Therefore I pray thee come with me, for over the whole world have I wandered in search of thee. Come with me, my son, for I have need of thy love."

But the Star-Child stirred not from his place, but shut the doors of his heart against her, nor was there any sound heard save the sound of the woman weeping for pain.

And at last he spoke to her, and his voice was hard and bitter. "If in very truth thou art my mother," he said, "it had been better hadst thou stayed away, and not come here to bring me to shame, seeing that I thought I was the child of some Star and not a beggar's child, as thou tellest me that I am. Therefore get thee hence, and let me see thee no more."

"Alas! my son," she cried, "wilt thou not kiss me before I go? For I have suffered much to find thee."

"Nay," said the Star-Child, "but thou art too foul to look at and rather would I kiss the adder or the toad than thee."

So the woman rose up, and went away into the forest weeping bitterly, and when the Star-Child saw that she had gone, he was glad, and ran back to his playmates that he might play with them.

But when they beheld him coming, they mocked him and said, "Why, thou art as foul as the toad, and as loathsome as the adder. Get thee hence, for we will not suffer thee to play with us," and they drave him out of the garden.

And the Star-Child frowned and said to himself, "What is this that they say to me? I will go to the well of water and look into it, and it shall tell me of my beauty."

So he went to the well of water and looked into it, and lo! his face was as the face of a toad, and his body was scaled like an adder. And he flung himself down on the grass and wept, and said to himself, "Surely this has come upon me by reason of my sin. For I have denied my mother, and driven her away, and been proud, and cruel to her. Wherefore I will go and seek her through the whole world, nor will I rest till I have found her."

And there came to him the little daughter of the Woodcutter, and she put her hand upon his shoulder and said, "What doth it matter if thou hast lost thy comeliness? Stay with us, and I will not mock at thee."

And he said to her, "Nay, but I have been cruel to my mother, and as a punishment has this evil been sent to me. Wherefore I must go hence, and wander through the world till I find her, and she give me her forgiveness."

So he ran away into the forest and called out to his mother to come to him, but there was no answer. All day long he called to her, and when the sun set he lay down to sleep on a bed of leaves, and the birds and the animals fled from him, as they remembered his cruelty, and he was alone save for the toad that watched him, and the slow adder that crawled past.

And in the morning he rose up, and plucked some bitter berries from the trees and ate them, and took his way through the great wood, weeping sorely. And of everything that he met he made enquiry if perchance they had seen his mother.

He said to the Mole, "Thou canst go beneath the earth. Tell me, is my mother there?"

And the Mole answered, "Thou hast blinded mine eyes. How should I know?"

He said to the Linnet, "Thou canst fly over the tops of the tall trees, and canst see the whole world. Tell me, canst thou see my mother?"

And the Linnet answered, "Thou hast clipt my wings for thy pleasure. How should I fly?"

And to the little Squirrel who lived in the fir-tree, and was lonely, he said, "Where is my mother?"

And the Squirrel answered, "Thou hast slain mine. Dost thou seek to slay thine also?"

And the Star-Child wept and bowed his head, and prayed forgiveness of God's things, and went on through the forest, seeking for the beggar-woman. And on the third day he came to the other side of the forest and went down into the plain.

And when he passed through the villages the children mocked him, and threw stones at him, and the carlots would not suffer him even to sleep in the byres lest he might bring mildew on the stored corn, so foul was he to look at, and their hired men drave him away, and there was none who had pity on him. Nor could he hear anywhere of the beggar-woman who was his mother, though for the space of three years he wandered over the world, and often seemed to see her on the road in front of him, and would call to her, and run after her till the sharp flints made his feet to bleed. But overtake her he could not, and those who dwelt by the way did ever deny that they had seen her, or any like to her, and they made sport of his sorrow.


中文翻译

“不,但你确实是我在森林里生下的我的小儿子,”她哭喊道,跪倒在地,向他伸出双臂。“强盗把你从我身边偷走,留下你等死,”她喃喃道,“但我一见到你就认出了你,我也认出了那些信物,那件金丝斗篷和琥珀项链。因此我恳求你跟我走,因为我已走遍整个世界寻找你。跟我走吧,我的儿子,因为我需要你的爱。”

但星孩待在原地一动不动,对她紧闭心扉,除了女人痛苦的哭泣声,听不到任何声响。

最后他终于对她开口,声音冷酷而苦涩。“如果你真是我的母亲,”他说,“你最好还是别来,不要到这里来让我蒙羞,因为我一直以为自己是某个星星的孩子,而不是像你告诉我的那样,是个乞丐的孩子。所以你快走吧,别再让我看见你。”

“唉!我的儿子,”她哭道,“在我走之前,你都不肯吻我一下吗?为了找到你,我吃了很多苦。”

“不,”星孩说,“你太丑陋了,我宁愿亲吻毒蛇或蟾蜍,也不愿吻你。”

于是女人站起身来,悲痛地哭泣着走进了森林。星孩看到她走了,很高兴,跑回他的玩伴那里,想和他们一起玩。

但当他们看到他过来时,都嘲笑他说:“哎呀,你像蟾蜍一样丑陋,像毒蛇一样令人憎恶。快走开,我们不会让你和我们一起玩的。”他们把他赶出了花园。

星孩皱起眉头,自言自语道:“他们这是什么意思?我要去水井边照一照,它会告诉我我的美貌。”

于是他走到水井边往里看,哎呀!他的脸变得像蟾蜍的脸,身体像毒蛇一样布满鳞片。他扑倒在草地上哭泣,自言自语道:“这肯定是因为我的罪过才降临到我身上的。因为我否认了我的母亲,赶走了她,对她傲慢而残忍。因此我要走遍全世界去寻找她,不找到她决不罢休。”

樵夫的小女儿来到他身边,把手放在他的肩上说:“就算你失去了俊美的容貌,又有什么关系呢?留下来和我们在一起吧,我不会嘲笑你的。”

他对她说:“不,我对我的母亲太残忍了,这厄运是作为惩罚降临到我身上的。因此我必须离开,在世间流浪,直到找到她,得到她的宽恕。”

于是他跑进森林,呼唤他的母亲到他身边来,但没有任何回应。他整天呼唤着她,太阳落山时,他躺在树叶铺成的床上睡觉,鸟儿和动物都因为记得他的残忍而逃离他,他孤身一人,只有一只蟾蜍注视着他,一条缓慢的毒蛇爬过。

早晨他起身,从树上摘了些苦浆果吃下,然后痛哭流涕地穿过大森林。他向他遇到的每一样东西打听,问它们是否可能见过他的母亲。

他对鼹鼠说:“你能钻到地下去。告诉我,我的母亲在那里吗?”

鼹鼠回答说:“你弄瞎了我的眼睛。我怎么会知道?”

他对红雀说:“你能飞过高高的树顶,能看到整个世界。告诉我,你能看见我的母亲吗?”

红雀回答说:“你为了取乐剪掉了我的翅膀。我怎么能飞?”

他对住在冷杉树上、孤零零的小松鼠说:“我的母亲在哪里?”

松鼠回答说:“你杀死了我的母亲。难道你也要寻找你的母亲来杀害吗?”

星孩哭泣着低下头,祈求上帝造物的宽恕,然后继续穿过森林,寻找那个乞丐女人。第三天,他来到了森林的另一边,下到了平原上。

当他穿过村庄时,孩子们嘲笑他,向他扔石头,村民们甚至不让他睡在牛棚里,生怕他会给储存的谷物带来霉病,因为他看起来太丑陋了,他们的雇工也把他赶走,没有人同情他。他也听不到任何关于他母亲——那个乞丐女人的消息,尽管他在世间流浪了三年之久,常常似乎看见她就在他前面的路上,他会呼唤她,追赶她,直到锋利的燧石划破他的双脚流血。但他始终追不上她,而沿途居住的人们总是否认见过她或任何像她的人,并且拿他的悲伤取乐。

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