English Original
A Crown Court judge spent a Friday evening sampling London's finest pubs. Returning home in the early hours, he realized he was in trouble: his Savile Row suit was stained with vomit.
"Charles!" his wife exclaimed. "What on earth have you been doing?"
Thinking quickly, he replied, "A dreadful ruffian was sick all over me as I was heading home. Fortunately, he was arrested shortly after, and I'll be hearing his case on Monday morning."
Monday arrived, and the judge conducted his business without issue. However, he still felt uneasy about explaining the incident to his detail-oriented wife. Suddenly, she called him in his chambers.
"Charles, what happened to that oik who ruined your jacket on Friday?" she asked.
"Well," he replied, "he hasn't appeared before me yet. The case was adjourned until this afternoon, but I'll certainly give him three months in prison."
"Frankly, Charles," she said, "I think you'd better give him six months—he's soiled your trousers as well!"
中文翻译
一位刑事法院的法官周五晚上在伦敦最好的几家酒吧畅饮。凌晨时分回到家，他意识到自己麻烦大了：他那套萨维尔街定制的西装上沾满了呕吐物。
"查尔斯！"他的妻子惊呼道。"你到底干什么去了？"
他灵机一动，回答道："我正要回家时，一个可恶的混蛋吐了我一身。幸运的是，他随后就被逮捕了，周一上午将由我审理他的案子。"
周一到了，法官顺利地处理着公务。然而，一想到要向那位观察入微的妻子解释这件事，他仍感到不安。突然，妻子打电话到他的办公室。
"查尔斯，周五晚上弄脏你夹克的那个混蛋怎么样了？"她问道。
"嗯，"他回答，"他还没出庭。案子延期到今天下午审理，但我肯定会判他三个月监禁。"
"老实说，查尔斯，"她说，"我觉得你最好判他六个月——他还弄脏了你的裤子！"