Final Exams from Children | 孩子们的期末考试

English Original

Q: Name the four seasons.
A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.

Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink.
A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.

Q: How is dew formed?
A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.

Q: How can you delay milk turning sour?
A: Keep it in the cow.

Q: What causes the tides in the oceans?
A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature hates a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.

Q: What are steroids?
A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.

Q: What happens to your body as you age?
A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.

Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
A: He says good-bye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.

Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes.
A: Premature death.

Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized? (e.g., abdomen.)
A: The body is consisted into three parts - the brainium, the Borax and the abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain; the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels, A, E, I, O, and U.

Q: What is the fibula?
A: A small lie.

Q: What does "varicose" mean? (I do love this one.)
A: Nearby.

Q: Give the meaning of the term "Caesarean Section".
A: The Caesarean Section is a district in Rome.

Q: What does the word "benign" mean?
A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.


中文翻译

问: 说出四季的名字。
答: 盐、胡椒、芥末和醋。

问: 解释一种使水可以安全饮用的过程。
答: 调情能让水变得安全,因为它能去除大的污染物,比如砂砾、沙子、死羊和划独木舟的人。

问: 露水是如何形成的?
答: 太阳照在叶子上,让它们出汗

问: 如何延迟牛奶变酸?
答: 把它留在奶牛里。

问: 是什么导致了海洋的潮汐?
答: 潮汐是地球和月球之间的一场战斗。所有的水都倾向于流向月球,因为月球上没有水,而大自然厌恶真空。我忘了太阳在这场战斗中扮演什么角色。

问: 类固醇是什么?
答: 用来让地毯在楼梯上保持不动的东西。

问: 随着年龄增长,你的身体会发生什么变化?
答: 当你变老时,你的肠子也变老了,然后你就变得洲际化了。

问: 当男孩进入青春期时会发生什么?
答: 他向童年告别,并期待着他的通奸。

问: 说出一种与香烟相关的主要疾病。
答: 过早死亡。

问: 身体的主要部分是如何分类的?(例如,腹部。)
答: 身体由三部分组成——大脑部、硼砂部和腹部腔。大脑部包含大脑;硼砂部包含心脏和肺;腹部腔包含五个元音肠子,A, E, I, O, 和 U。

问: 什么是腓骨?
答: 一个小谎言。

问: "varicose"是什么意思?(我真的很喜欢这个。)
答: 在附近。

问: 给出术语"剖腹产"的含义。
答: 剖腹产区是罗马的一个区。

问: "良性"这个词是什么意思?
答: 良性就是你过了八岁之后的状态。

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