Two friends on a girls' night out had one too many cocktails. On their way home, quite intoxicated, they both felt the urgent need to relieve themselves. Finding themselves near a graveyard, one suggested they go behind a headstone.
The first woman, having nothing to wipe with, removed her panties, used them, and discarded them. Her friend, wearing expensive lingerie, didn't want to ruin hers. Instead, she spotted and salvaged a large ribbon from a wreath on a grave and used that.
The next day, the first woman's husband called the other and complained, "These girls' nights out have to stop. My wife came home without her panties last night!"
"That's nothing," replied the other husband. "Mine came back with a sympathy card stuck between her butt cheeks. It read, 'From all of us at the Fire Station. We'll never forget you!'"